If Vanessa Huxtable went to Brandcenter...

She'd be a whiny little B*- the whole time. Everyone would hate working with her cause all she would do is complain. Except she'd always bring Jello pudding pops for everyone in her meetings cause she would get them free from all her fictitional father's endorsements. We'd like that. We'd also like it when she'd organize everyone together on the stairs and have us perfrom lip syncing routines to James Brown and Ray Charles songs for Boyko and his wife. Although she would always get jealous when Sruti would steal the show with her lip syncing and dancing solos cause she's so adorable. No one would notice Vanessa again til the next pudding pop meeting came around. If Vanessa Huxtable went to Brandcenter.

If Michael Bolton went to Brandcenter...

He would be the best singer there. Besides Anthony. His soft rock ballads would cruise through the cafeteria air, filling everyone's eardrums with sweet melodic pleasure. He'd also be the best brand manager to work with because he'd sing passionate love songs about each of his brands for presentations. Everything would be going along swimmingly until he was put in a group with Capocelli and they spent the entire time arguing over who had the best hair, which would eventually end in tears with both of them, until they stopped crying long enough to look deeply into each others eyes and fall maddly in love. Their love would overpower them and he would stop singing at school. He'd convice her to drop out and elope at his cabin in wyoming where they would eventually have 4 kids. All with wild curly hair and gut wrenchingly fierce tenor voices. No one would miss him. If Michael Bolton went to Brandcenter.

If Kris Kross went to Brandcenter

They'd be an inseparable duo of copywriter and retirwypoc. Not because they would work well together but because no one else would want to work with either of them cause they write everything so that you can only read if you hold it up to a mirror. Plus they would present everything in rap. Rick would conclude that they're dyslexic and hire Gaurav to tutor them because he knows english better than anyone else here. At least that's what it said in the mailer. The three of them would join forces and with some sort of twisted magic and nonsensical rhythm they'd create a book that somehow wasn't wickedy wickedy wack. If Kris Kross went to Brandcenter.

If Cookie Monster went to Brancenter...

He'd be disgusted by the lack of cookies the new building offers and develop an affinity for consuming massive quantities of fake ads. He'd stand at the color printers and wait till a delicious fake ad was printed and then ravagingly consume it with a noise that could only be duplicated by Tim Gordon's vocal chords. Soon no one would be able to print anymore and Leslie Buker would get into a huge fight with him in the print room. Rob would intervene and the room would erupt in chaos with yelling screaming crumpling and eating and would eventually end in giggling amongst Leslie and Rob. Cookie would continue his craft and ignore them. If Cookie Monster went to Brandcenter.

If Jessie Spano went to Brandcenter

She would constantly be saying, "There's never any time!" and would get all doped up on caffeine pills so she could stay up late and work on her fake ads that are due the next day in Wayne's class. She'd have a nervous breakdown and Nick would come by and say "hey what about this idea." And she'd suddenly realize that their friendship was far deeper and more meaningful than fake ads. She'd then come up with a radical repositioning campaign for Buddy Bands and Wayne would ask her if it's a "reminder campaign." We would laugh and talk about what happenend behind her back. Then Josh would call her "mama" and she'd get all huffy and slap him. If Jessie Spano went to Brandcenter.